I was carrying in the giant dictionary book/contraption I was conned into buying in a mall parking lot yesterday. It's a picture dictionary (for kids, obviously) and out of nowhere it hit me, We still have to go through the whole learn-letters-learn-to-read-this-is-an-apple thing with baby i. When you have children so far apart in age (8 years!) you apparently not only forget what you've been through but what you yet to go through. I'm not saying I'm not up for it (and what choice do I have, really?) it's just that it's daunting.
A friend of mine brilliantly described one of her issues as hair Dismorphia. I'm afraid I have the opposite problem. I think my hair looks okay and then I see a picture and I think, Oh Christ... this is what I look like? So I proceed to get it cut into layers (I think this was a mistake of proportions to teach other mistakes a lesson), continue to go to someone who obviously drinks before she gets to work for color, and in general look like I have a mushroom on my head. It's twisted when you hope for a disorder that ultimately means things are better than you think!
On that subject... so I never told BP about my blog because a) he'd make fun of me b) I didn't want him to make fun of me and c) he'd relentlessly bring in bits of it into every conversation ("That's not what you said on your blog!" or "Oh, are you gonna go write about this in your blog?" or "Go ask your friends in your comments section of your blog to feel sorry for you..." etc). I'm not saying he's mean. He just goes out of his way to get his OWN laughs. So, he finds out I have a blog (Thanks, Kevin... :)) and I told him why I never told him about it ("I didn't want you to make fun of me.") and he agrees! I said, "I'll give you the URL but you won't even really read it anyway!" He agrees again. Conversation closed. So - ... the hell? He knows his wife has what amounts to a public diary and he passes on the chance to read it? I know he hates to read and all... but really?
Next week I have to go in for the new two days a month in the office I agreed upon. You'd think I'd be dreading it. Nope. I can't wait to have nowhere to go but a desk for eight hours. Nothing to do but sit. I'll work some, too, but mostly I'll be sitting facing forward quietly minding my own business and loving every single second of it.
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3 comments:
i have serious hair dysmorphia. i swear, it looks good in a mirror and then i see a picture and i just want to pull a britney.
i have finally accepted that i am simply incapable of making objective assessments about my appearance. you know how you see a picture of yourself and think it's a good one and then go back a week later and are like, 'the hell????' that's pretty much my life these days, lmao.
**waves to b-po** no way he'll be able to resist reading.
have fun at work--i go back a week from thursday, officially, but i'll probably go back on tuesday and wednesday just to get away. i'd go today if i could justify it.
I laughed, I cried, I deleted the web address.
I call bullshit b-po. =) Not when you have access to such a wealth of info to tease our lovely T about!
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